1 00:00:29,975 --> 00:00:32,655 ...and he loves pecans and walnuts, 2 00:00:32,655 --> 00:00:36,055 and he simply adores those little cheese footballs, 3 00:00:36,055 --> 00:00:38,735 don't you, my darling? 4 00:00:38,735 --> 00:00:41,535 Oh, isn't he beautiful? 5 00:00:41,535 --> 00:00:44,815 Very attractive little fellow. What is he? 6 00:00:44,815 --> 00:00:46,055 He's a little Shih-Tzu. 7 00:00:46,055 --> 00:00:47,455 Is he really? 8 00:00:47,455 --> 00:00:49,455 Oh, dear, what breed is it? 9 00:00:49,455 --> 00:00:54,375 They're lap-dogs, aren't they? 10 00:00:54,375 --> 00:00:55,375 A lap-dog? 11 00:00:55,375 --> 00:00:58,615 Hard to imagine him stalking a reindeer, what? 12 00:00:58,615 --> 00:00:59,855 Major, can I get you another one? 13 00:00:59,855 --> 00:01:01,535 Why not? Why not? 14 00:01:01,535 --> 00:01:02,535 For you, Mrs. Chase? 15 00:01:02,535 --> 00:01:03,935 Nothing for me, thank you. 16 00:01:03,935 --> 00:01:06,695 But Prince would like a little saucer of warm milk. 17 00:01:06,695 --> 00:01:09,095 - It's nearly our bedtime and... - Yes, Manuel! 18 00:01:09,095 --> 00:01:11,455 Manuel will attend to its heart's desires. 19 00:01:11,455 --> 00:01:13,295 I'm afraid I'm with the people tonight. 20 00:01:13,295 --> 00:01:17,208 Manuel, por favor, el perro microscopico. 21 00:01:18,215 --> 00:01:19,495 Good evening, Dr. Price. 22 00:01:19,495 --> 00:01:20,495 Good evening. 23 00:01:20,495 --> 00:01:21,735 What can I get you? 24 00:01:21,735 --> 00:01:22,895 Scotch, please. 25 00:01:22,895 --> 00:01:25,095 I suppose it's too late to get anything to eat? I missed dinner. 26 00:01:25,095 --> 00:01:26,815 What did you have in mind? 27 00:01:26,815 --> 00:01:28,935 I rather fancy some sausages. 28 00:01:28,935 --> 00:01:31,655 I'm afraid chef would have locked them away. 29 00:01:31,655 --> 00:01:34,775 We could do you sandwiches... ham, cheese, tomato? 30 00:01:34,775 --> 00:01:36,215 Ham, thank you. 31 00:01:36,215 --> 00:01:38,495 I'll just arrange it for you. 32 00:01:38,495 --> 00:01:41,535 - Basil? - Dear? 33 00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:42,935 Could you make some ham sandwiches? 34 00:01:42,935 --> 00:01:44,695 - Look, I'm... - For Dr. Price. 35 00:01:44,695 --> 00:01:46,935 Of course, yes, one moment, Doctor. 36 00:01:46,935 --> 00:01:48,855 There we are, Major. 37 00:01:48,855 --> 00:01:50,055 Excuse me. Phone. 38 00:01:50,055 --> 00:01:52,015 Found another draft, have we? 39 00:01:52,015 --> 00:01:54,135 We have to be very careful, Mr. Fawlty, 40 00:01:54,135 --> 00:01:55,495 he's not very strong. 41 00:01:55,495 --> 00:01:57,495 Indeed, yes. A rapid movement of air 42 00:01:57,495 --> 00:01:58,855 could damage him irreparably. 43 00:01:58,855 --> 00:02:02,135 If only one could keep them in airtight containers. 44 00:02:02,135 --> 00:02:04,375 Wouldn't be able to breathe, would he, Fawlty? 45 00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:05,895 He could try, Major, he could try. 46 00:02:05,895 --> 00:02:07,695 Anything else for you? 47 00:02:07,695 --> 00:02:10,655 No, thank you, no, it's a bit late. We'd better get upstairs. 48 00:02:10,655 --> 00:02:11,849 Quite, quite. 49 00:02:13,055 --> 00:02:14,855 Sorry to have kept you. 50 00:02:14,855 --> 00:02:16,735 Doctor, one round, two? 51 00:02:16,735 --> 00:02:17,735 Just one, please. 52 00:02:17,735 --> 00:02:19,134 My pleasure. 53 00:02:20,335 --> 00:02:24,375 No, she was the one he had with him the third time. 54 00:02:24,375 --> 00:02:26,015 The first one was the dowdy one, 55 00:02:26,015 --> 00:02:28,935 then his wife, then her, and now this red... 56 00:02:28,935 --> 00:02:31,895 oh, yes, that must have been lovely. 57 00:02:31,895 --> 00:02:34,489 Number 12? Let's see. 58 00:02:36,055 --> 00:02:37,895 Thank you. 59 00:02:37,895 --> 00:02:41,171 How very lovely... yes, that was them. 60 00:02:42,175 --> 00:02:45,655 Not much, they get less fussy as they get older. 61 00:02:45,655 --> 00:02:46,655 Sorry about this. 62 00:02:46,655 --> 00:02:48,655 It couldn't matter less. We're meeting in the morning anyway. 63 00:02:48,655 --> 00:02:51,055 - You've had a long journey. - Get a good night's sleep. 64 00:02:51,055 --> 00:02:52,175 You're sure you're feeling all right? 65 00:02:52,175 --> 00:02:53,575 Fine, fine, just a little... 66 00:02:53,575 --> 00:02:54,935 Oh yes, of course. 67 00:02:54,935 --> 00:02:57,495 You get straight to bed, we'll pick you up here at 9:30. 68 00:02:57,495 --> 00:02:59,575 We'll have coffee, and go in to the M.D. At 10: 00. 69 00:02:59,575 --> 00:03:01,775 Fine, thanks. Okay, good night. 70 00:03:01,775 --> 00:03:03,135 - Sleep well. - Good night. 71 00:03:03,135 --> 00:03:04,815 - Bye. - See you in the morning. 72 00:03:04,815 --> 00:03:06,695 See you at 9:30 then. 73 00:03:06,695 --> 00:03:08,135 Sorry. 74 00:03:08,135 --> 00:03:11,015 Harris? Oh, no, on his own again. 75 00:03:11,015 --> 00:03:12,895 Oh, no, I wouldn't have thought so. 76 00:03:12,895 --> 00:03:14,015 He watches the football. 77 00:03:14,015 --> 00:03:16,324 - Number 8, isn't it? - Thank you. 78 00:03:18,975 --> 00:03:20,455 Are you feeling all right? 79 00:03:20,455 --> 00:03:21,815 Not too good, no. 80 00:03:21,815 --> 00:03:23,695 Would you like a little hot something? 81 00:03:23,695 --> 00:03:24,975 No, fine, thank you. 82 00:03:24,975 --> 00:03:27,175 - Well, If there's anything you need... - Thank you. 83 00:03:27,175 --> 00:03:29,455 That wasn't him, that was a new one. 84 00:03:29,455 --> 00:03:30,888 Good night. 85 00:03:32,135 --> 00:03:33,575 I said, "Good night." 86 00:03:33,575 --> 00:03:34,975 Oh, good night. 87 00:03:34,975 --> 00:03:36,169 Didn't hurt, did it? 88 00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:39,255 - Basil. - Good manners cost nothing. 89 00:03:39,255 --> 00:03:41,255 He's not feeling very well, Basil. 90 00:03:41,255 --> 00:03:43,855 He only had to say "Good night." It's not the Gettysburg Address. 91 00:03:43,855 --> 00:03:45,895 Basil, when you're not feeling well... 92 00:03:45,895 --> 00:03:47,215 Just two little words, dear, 93 00:03:47,215 --> 00:03:49,255 that bring a little happiness into the world. 94 00:03:49,255 --> 00:03:50,375 Excuse me? 95 00:03:50,375 --> 00:03:52,255 Yes, Mr. Leeman, what can I do for you? 96 00:03:52,255 --> 00:03:53,695 Do you think I might have breakfast in bed in the morning? 97 00:03:53,695 --> 00:03:55,575 - In bed? - Yes. 98 00:03:55,575 --> 00:03:58,095 - Of course, Mr. Leeman. - Yes, we can manage that. 99 00:03:58,095 --> 00:03:59,095 Yes, we can. I'll call you back. 100 00:03:59,095 --> 00:04:00,655 I'm sorry? 101 00:04:00,655 --> 00:04:02,566 Most of our guests manage to struggle down in the morning. 102 00:04:04,175 --> 00:04:06,775 A full breakfast or the continental? 103 00:04:06,775 --> 00:04:07,935 Oh, I don't... 104 00:04:07,935 --> 00:04:09,815 Our chef does a very good full breakfast, 105 00:04:09,815 --> 00:04:12,695 eggs, bacon, sausages, tomato, fried bread... 106 00:04:12,695 --> 00:04:14,055 The continental. 107 00:04:14,055 --> 00:04:15,055 You wouldn't care for kippers? 108 00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,575 Fine, kippers, thank you. 109 00:04:16,575 --> 00:04:18,015 Toast, butter, marmalade? 110 00:04:18,015 --> 00:04:19,015 Thank you. 111 00:04:19,015 --> 00:04:21,175 - Tea or coffee? - Tea, thank you. 112 00:04:21,175 --> 00:04:22,255 Newspaper? 113 00:04:22,255 --> 00:04:24,644 - The Telegraph. - Thank you, good night. 114 00:04:26,695 --> 00:04:28,287 Rosewood, mahogany, teak? 115 00:04:30,375 --> 00:04:31,695 I beg your pardon? 116 00:04:31,695 --> 00:04:33,572 What would you like your breakfast tray made out of? 117 00:04:34,855 --> 00:04:35,935 I don't really mind. 118 00:04:35,935 --> 00:04:37,295 Are you sure? Fine, you go along, 119 00:04:37,295 --> 00:04:39,055 and have a really good night's sleep, then. 120 00:04:39,055 --> 00:04:41,055 I'm hoping to get a couple of hours myself. 121 00:04:41,055 --> 00:04:42,175 I'll be up in good time 122 00:04:42,175 --> 00:04:43,655 to serve you your breakfast in bed. 123 00:04:43,655 --> 00:04:45,535 If you can remember to sleep with your mouth open, 124 00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:46,895 you won't even have to wake up. 125 00:04:46,895 --> 00:04:49,695 I'll drop in small pieces of lightly buttered kipper 126 00:04:49,695 --> 00:04:50,855 when you're breathing in the right direction, 127 00:04:50,855 --> 00:04:52,891 if that doesn't put you out! 128 00:04:54,775 --> 00:04:55,844 Basil! 129 00:04:59,175 --> 00:05:01,175 - Sausages, please. - Just sausages? 130 00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:02,655 Hmm, just sausages. 131 00:05:02,655 --> 00:05:04,535 - Tea or coffee? - Coffee, please. 132 00:05:04,535 --> 00:05:06,975 - But is... - No, not a saucer. 133 00:05:06,975 --> 00:05:08,695 - Cômo? - I said a bowl. 134 00:05:08,695 --> 00:05:09,695 A ball? 135 00:05:09,695 --> 00:05:11,135 Yes, and not cold like that. 136 00:05:11,135 --> 00:05:13,655 That's too cold. I said tepid, didn't I? 137 00:05:13,655 --> 00:05:16,931 Mas grande, Manuel. De agua caliente. 138 00:05:17,135 --> 00:05:18,295 He could catch pneumonia from that. 139 00:05:18,295 --> 00:05:20,175 And bring another cushion. 140 00:05:20,175 --> 00:05:21,688 He's not quite high enough. 141 00:05:23,015 --> 00:05:24,655 Sausages on six, Terry. 142 00:05:24,655 --> 00:05:26,935 - Coming up. - Mas grande, Manuel. 143 00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:28,175 Another car strike. Would you believe it? 144 00:05:28,175 --> 00:05:30,055 Put these kippers back, would you, Basil? 145 00:05:30,055 --> 00:05:32,135 We ought to get Butlin's to run our car factories. 146 00:05:32,135 --> 00:05:33,895 In the fridge. 147 00:05:33,895 --> 00:05:35,975 These should have been eaten by... when was the sixth? 148 00:05:35,975 --> 00:05:36,975 Oh, that's all right. 149 00:05:36,975 --> 00:05:38,215 It says on the packet, Sybil. 150 00:05:38,215 --> 00:05:39,615 They're all right, Mr. Fawlty. 151 00:05:39,615 --> 00:05:40,615 The sixth? 152 00:05:40,615 --> 00:05:41,935 That's just to cover themselves. 153 00:05:41,935 --> 00:05:43,254 Eggs and sausages, Poll. 154 00:05:49,295 --> 00:05:51,286 On the table, on the table. 155 00:05:52,295 --> 00:05:54,013 No! 156 00:05:55,015 --> 00:05:56,448 That! 157 00:05:57,455 --> 00:05:59,844 Now, put that under him. 158 00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:03,775 The cushion! The cushion! 159 00:06:03,775 --> 00:06:05,695 Sí. 160 00:06:05,695 --> 00:06:06,684 Ow! 161 00:06:08,935 --> 00:06:09,975 He bite me! 162 00:06:09,975 --> 00:06:11,615 You frightened him. 163 00:06:11,615 --> 00:06:12,655 Qué? 164 00:06:12,655 --> 00:06:14,015 You make sudden movements like that, 165 00:06:14,015 --> 00:06:15,335 of course he's going to bite. 166 00:06:15,335 --> 00:06:17,610 Don't you have dogs in Calcutta? 167 00:06:21,375 --> 00:06:23,015 Excuse me, but I have an order 168 00:06:23,015 --> 00:06:25,215 for eggs and sausages for this table. 169 00:06:25,215 --> 00:06:26,933 Yes, the sausages are for him. 170 00:06:28,935 --> 00:06:30,135 What's the matter, Manuel? 171 00:06:30,135 --> 00:06:31,775 He bite me. 172 00:06:31,775 --> 00:06:33,891 Cut them up into little pieces. 173 00:06:36,855 --> 00:06:39,855 No, not my eggs. The sausages. 174 00:06:39,855 --> 00:06:41,175 Oh, sorry. 175 00:06:41,175 --> 00:06:42,255 Oh! 176 00:06:42,255 --> 00:06:44,335 He bite Polly, too. You see? 177 00:06:44,335 --> 00:06:46,735 If dogs are allowed in the dining room, 178 00:06:46,735 --> 00:06:48,855 at least the staff should know how to handle them. 179 00:06:48,855 --> 00:06:51,055 I'll cut them up in the kitchen, Mrs. Chase. 180 00:06:51,055 --> 00:06:52,329 Little pieces. 181 00:06:55,015 --> 00:06:56,055 Kippers ready. 182 00:06:56,055 --> 00:06:57,975 He hurt you, Polly? 183 00:06:57,975 --> 00:06:59,615 Basil, what are you doing? 184 00:06:59,615 --> 00:07:00,975 Do you know when the sixth was? 185 00:07:00,975 --> 00:07:02,895 Will you just take it upstairs? 186 00:07:02,895 --> 00:07:04,335 They're all right, Mr. Fawlty. 187 00:07:04,335 --> 00:07:05,855 Are they supposed to be that color? 188 00:07:05,855 --> 00:07:08,455 Basil, will you just take it up? What's the matter, Manuel? 189 00:07:08,455 --> 00:07:10,215 That hairy mosquito just bit us both. 190 00:07:10,215 --> 00:07:11,455 What? 191 00:07:11,455 --> 00:07:12,855 It's not right in dining room like that. 192 00:07:12,855 --> 00:07:14,535 She pays extra for the dog. 193 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:15,975 Basil, it's after 8:00. 194 00:07:15,975 --> 00:07:17,975 Poisoning is still an offense in this country. 195 00:07:17,975 --> 00:07:19,975 Do get a move on, we've got a busy day. 196 00:07:19,975 --> 00:07:21,095 I've got the laundrymen coming. 197 00:07:21,095 --> 00:07:22,975 The laundrymen. My God! 198 00:07:22,975 --> 00:07:24,852 A woman's work is never delegated, is it? 199 00:07:26,095 --> 00:07:27,095 What are you doing, Polly? 200 00:07:27,095 --> 00:07:29,855 Just preparing some sausages. 201 00:07:29,855 --> 00:07:32,449 Bangers a la bang. 202 00:07:36,815 --> 00:07:38,214 Good morning, breakfast. 203 00:07:41,575 --> 00:07:42,928 Breakfast. 204 00:07:46,855 --> 00:07:49,895 Here we are. Another car strike. Marvelous, isn't it? 205 00:07:49,895 --> 00:07:51,255 Taxpayers pay 'em millions each year, 206 00:07:51,255 --> 00:07:54,975 they get the money, go on strike. It's called socialism. 207 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:56,175 If they don't like making cars, 208 00:07:56,175 --> 00:07:57,735 why don't they get themselves another bloody job 209 00:07:57,735 --> 00:08:00,415 designing cathedrals or composing violin concertos? 210 00:08:00,415 --> 00:08:03,615 The British Leyland Concerto, in four movements, all of 'em slow, 211 00:08:03,615 --> 00:08:05,175 with a four-hour tea break in between. 212 00:08:05,175 --> 00:08:07,455 I'll tell you why, 'cause they're not interested in anything, 213 00:08:07,455 --> 00:08:09,775 except lounging about on conveyor belts stuffing themselves with my money. 214 00:08:09,775 --> 00:08:11,215 You don't mind if I turn the light off? 215 00:08:11,215 --> 00:08:13,012 Well, enjoy your breakfast. 216 00:08:15,935 --> 00:08:17,732 I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. 217 00:08:19,335 --> 00:08:21,326 Not at all, thank you for mentioning it. 218 00:08:22,775 --> 00:08:25,135 Unbelievable. Un-be-lievable. 219 00:08:25,135 --> 00:08:27,808 Not a single bloody word. 220 00:08:28,895 --> 00:08:30,895 You get up at 5:30 in the morning 221 00:08:30,895 --> 00:08:32,695 so they can lounge around in bed till midday 222 00:08:32,695 --> 00:08:33,775 and do you get so much as a word of thanks? 223 00:08:33,775 --> 00:08:34,895 - What's that? - Forgot the milk. 224 00:08:34,895 --> 00:08:37,735 Don't get talking to him, you'll never get away. 225 00:08:37,735 --> 00:08:38,935 Would you believe it? 226 00:08:38,935 --> 00:08:41,255 I get him his breakfast, I take it all the way upstairs, 227 00:08:41,255 --> 00:08:43,615 I lay it in front of him, hand him his newspaper, 228 00:08:43,615 --> 00:08:46,493 I tidy the room, draw the curtains, guess what he says? 229 00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:49,815 I said, "Guess what he says?" 230 00:08:49,815 --> 00:08:50,975 Hmmm? 231 00:08:50,975 --> 00:08:52,408 Nothing! 232 00:08:53,855 --> 00:08:55,971 Your friend! The one in eight. Nothing, not a word. 233 00:08:56,975 --> 00:09:00,855 Are you listening? Hello, can anybody hear me? 234 00:09:00,855 --> 00:09:03,055 Have I ceased to exist? Have I suddenly become invisible? 235 00:09:03,055 --> 00:09:04,735 Sybil, Sybil, Sybil, can you see me? 236 00:09:04,735 --> 00:09:05,895 No. 237 00:09:05,895 --> 00:09:07,975 Good, I'll go and lie down then. 238 00:09:07,975 --> 00:09:10,615 No I won't, I'll go and hit some guests. 239 00:09:10,615 --> 00:09:14,575 Poor little toma-woma-boy. 240 00:09:14,575 --> 00:09:15,644 Oh, let me... 241 00:09:16,695 --> 00:09:18,845 Dr. Price's sausages. 242 00:09:22,055 --> 00:09:23,615 What is it, Polly? 243 00:09:23,615 --> 00:09:24,935 He's dead. 244 00:09:24,935 --> 00:09:27,415 - Dead, who? - Number eight. 245 00:09:27,415 --> 00:09:30,855 Leeman? But Basil just took him his breakfast. 246 00:09:30,855 --> 00:09:31,935 He's cold. 247 00:09:31,935 --> 00:09:33,004 Oh, no. 248 00:09:37,015 --> 00:09:38,855 What's the matter with that dog? 249 00:09:38,855 --> 00:09:41,015 He is dead. 250 00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:42,895 He's certainly struggling for life at the moment. 251 00:09:42,895 --> 00:09:44,495 A dead dog in the breakfast room. 252 00:09:44,495 --> 00:09:46,775 Egon Ronay would knock off a star for that. 253 00:09:46,775 --> 00:09:48,606 No, no, Mr. Leeman dead. 254 00:09:49,855 --> 00:09:51,015 Well, that would explain a lot. 255 00:09:51,015 --> 00:09:52,935 No, Mr. Fawlty. 256 00:09:52,935 --> 00:09:54,775 Really. Poll just said so. 257 00:09:54,775 --> 00:09:57,735 What are you on about? I just took him his kippers. 258 00:09:57,735 --> 00:09:58,850 Oh, my God! 259 00:10:02,375 --> 00:10:03,933 Leeman's dead, I'm getting Dr. Price. 260 00:10:06,255 --> 00:10:09,015 I just put the milk down on the tray... 261 00:10:09,015 --> 00:10:10,375 What are you doing? 262 00:10:10,375 --> 00:10:12,135 What are you doing? 263 00:10:12,135 --> 00:10:14,295 I told her. I told her the sixth. We could get 20 years for this. 264 00:10:14,295 --> 00:10:15,495 What? 265 00:10:15,495 --> 00:10:17,735 The kippers, the kippers! Oh, my God! 266 00:10:17,735 --> 00:10:19,695 Mr. Fawlty, he's been dead for hours. 267 00:10:19,695 --> 00:10:23,055 M. Fawlty, he's cold. He's been dead for hours. 268 00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:25,255 He must have died in his sleep. 269 00:10:25,255 --> 00:10:26,255 Mr. Fawlty! 270 00:10:26,255 --> 00:10:27,255 What? What? 271 00:10:27,255 --> 00:10:31,248 He hasn't touched those kippers. Well, look! Feel him. 272 00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:34,564 - What? - Feel him. 273 00:10:38,095 --> 00:10:40,290 - He's stone cold. - Yes. 274 00:10:41,735 --> 00:10:45,135 Oh, joy! Thank you, God. 275 00:10:45,135 --> 00:10:48,366 Oh, isn't it wonderful? I'm so happy! Hooray! 276 00:10:49,655 --> 00:10:51,725 Sad, isn't it? 277 00:10:55,975 --> 00:10:57,535 May I ask who...? 278 00:10:57,535 --> 00:11:00,333 Bit stuffy, isn't it? I'll open a window. 279 00:11:01,415 --> 00:11:03,015 Who...? 280 00:11:03,015 --> 00:11:05,895 - Who found the body? - Polly did. 281 00:11:05,895 --> 00:11:07,575 I was bringing him up the milk, 282 00:11:07,575 --> 00:11:08,935 we'd forgotten it. 283 00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:10,975 You brought the milk with the breakfast? 284 00:11:10,975 --> 00:11:13,364 No, the breakfast was already up. 285 00:11:14,655 --> 00:11:15,655 Who brought the breakfast? 286 00:11:15,655 --> 00:11:17,247 Who found him? 287 00:11:18,855 --> 00:11:20,413 Oh, I brought the breakfast. 288 00:11:21,735 --> 00:11:24,335 - What's that? - That's a bit of it. 289 00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:26,644 - Bit of what? - A bit of the breakfast. 290 00:11:28,415 --> 00:11:29,415 You brought him his breakfast? 291 00:11:29,415 --> 00:11:30,415 Yes. 292 00:11:30,415 --> 00:11:31,615 So you told her he was dead? 293 00:11:31,615 --> 00:11:32,604 Yes. 294 00:11:34,095 --> 00:11:35,926 Then why did you bring him... 295 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:39,935 Why did you bring him the milk then? 296 00:11:39,935 --> 00:11:42,335 - Why? - Yes, why? 297 00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:45,415 When he said "Mr. Leeman was dead," 298 00:11:45,415 --> 00:11:47,535 I thought he said, "He's still in bed." 299 00:11:47,535 --> 00:11:49,935 He didn't exactly say he was dead, Doctor. 300 00:11:49,935 --> 00:11:51,015 I said he was pretty quiet. 301 00:11:51,015 --> 00:11:52,495 - Quiet? - Exactly. 302 00:11:52,495 --> 00:11:55,895 What were you talking to him about? Car strikes, was it? 303 00:11:55,895 --> 00:11:58,575 Thank you, Sybil. 304 00:11:58,575 --> 00:12:00,975 I don't understand. He's been dead about 10 hours. 305 00:12:00,975 --> 00:12:02,015 It's so final, isn't it? 306 00:12:02,015 --> 00:12:03,015 Basil! 307 00:12:03,015 --> 00:12:05,655 Wouldn't you say it was final? I'd say it was pretty bloody final. 308 00:12:05,655 --> 00:12:08,815 Do you mean to tell me you didn't realize this man was dead? 309 00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:11,615 People don't talk that much in the morning. I'm just delivering a tray, right? 310 00:12:11,615 --> 00:12:12,855 If the guest isn't singing, 311 00:12:12,855 --> 00:12:14,895 "Oh, what a beautiful morning," I don't immediately think, 312 00:12:14,895 --> 00:12:16,495 "There's another one snuffed it in the night. 313 00:12:16,495 --> 00:12:18,935 Another name in the Fawlty Towers Book of Remembrance." 314 00:12:18,935 --> 00:12:21,055 I mean, this is a hotel, not a Burma railway. 315 00:12:21,055 --> 00:12:22,135 Basil! 316 00:12:22,135 --> 00:12:25,575 It does actually say "Hotel" outside. Perhaps I should be more specific. 317 00:12:25,575 --> 00:12:28,255 "Hotel for people who have a better than 50% chance 318 00:12:28,255 --> 00:12:29,734 of making it through the night." 319 00:12:30,735 --> 00:12:32,930 What are you looking at me like that for? 320 00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:37,015 Basil... 321 00:12:37,015 --> 00:12:39,575 there's a kipper sticking out of your jumper. 322 00:12:42,575 --> 00:12:44,575 There it is. I've been looking for that. 323 00:12:44,575 --> 00:12:45,564 That's the other one. 324 00:12:46,855 --> 00:12:48,855 We'll be downstairs, Doctor. 325 00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:49,855 Shall I ring the undertaker? 326 00:12:49,855 --> 00:12:51,175 Would you, Polly? 327 00:12:51,175 --> 00:12:52,847 I've been up since 5:30, you know? 328 00:12:56,135 --> 00:12:58,775 He was leaving today. Some people are coming at lunchtime. 329 00:12:58,775 --> 00:13:01,335 - We'll put them in another room. - We're full tonight. 330 00:13:01,335 --> 00:13:02,768 Oh, do put that away! 331 00:13:04,375 --> 00:13:06,655 Get the body into the office until the undertakers come. 332 00:13:06,655 --> 00:13:07,655 Now? 333 00:13:07,655 --> 00:13:08,690 When the doctor's finished. 334 00:13:12,855 --> 00:13:15,655 - What are you doing? - Making up his bill. 335 00:13:15,655 --> 00:13:16,655 Who are you going to give it to? 336 00:13:16,655 --> 00:13:18,735 We'll leave it in his wallet, they're bound to look there. 337 00:13:18,735 --> 00:13:20,726 Better not charge him for breakfast. 338 00:13:22,375 --> 00:13:24,655 Mr. Simkins? Fawlty Towers here. 339 00:13:24,655 --> 00:13:26,855 I'm afraid somebody's died during the night. 340 00:13:26,855 --> 00:13:29,615 When could you collect the body? 341 00:13:29,615 --> 00:13:31,495 Somebody, anybody, really. 342 00:13:31,495 --> 00:13:32,495 Good morning, good morning. 343 00:13:32,495 --> 00:13:35,295 You're very cheerful this morning. 344 00:13:35,295 --> 00:13:36,933 Well, one of the guests has just died. 345 00:13:38,695 --> 00:13:40,447 You are wicked. 346 00:13:41,455 --> 00:13:42,968 Manuel, Manuel! 347 00:13:44,855 --> 00:13:47,095 Manuel, we go and get the body. 348 00:13:47,095 --> 00:13:48,735 Polly! Polly! 349 00:13:48,735 --> 00:13:49,815 Yes, if you can. 350 00:13:49,815 --> 00:13:51,214 Would it be all right to move the... 351 00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:57,535 Could I use the phone, please? I have to call the coroner. 352 00:13:57,535 --> 00:13:58,655 The coroner?! 353 00:13:58,655 --> 00:14:00,855 I can't give him his death certificate, I'm not his doctor. 354 00:14:00,855 --> 00:14:02,135 I have to report his death to the coroner. 355 00:14:02,135 --> 00:14:04,126 I see, of course. Come this way, Doctor. 356 00:14:05,495 --> 00:14:07,455 - All clear? - All clear. 357 00:14:07,455 --> 00:14:08,815 Is heavy. 358 00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:10,089 Come on, come on! 359 00:14:11,255 --> 00:14:12,295 Good morning, Manuel. 360 00:14:12,295 --> 00:14:14,375 - Oh, good morning. - Oh! 361 00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:16,415 It's all right, leave it. It's heavy. 362 00:14:16,415 --> 00:14:17,895 It's quite all right. I'll put them like that. 363 00:14:17,895 --> 00:14:19,615 - Don't bother. We can manage. - It's no bother. 364 00:14:19,615 --> 00:14:20,895 No, no, leave it alone. 365 00:14:20,895 --> 00:14:22,335 I know, if I fold them like this... 366 00:14:22,335 --> 00:14:23,335 Yes, go away. Move, Manuel! 367 00:14:23,335 --> 00:14:24,814 Move, move, move. 368 00:14:26,175 --> 00:14:28,695 - I'll do it, Miss Tibbs. - No, it's all right. 369 00:14:28,695 --> 00:14:30,935 He's dead! 370 00:14:30,935 --> 00:14:32,575 - Serves you right. - Shh! Shh! 371 00:14:32,575 --> 00:14:35,135 - O-oh, my God! - It's all right, Miss Tibbs. 372 00:14:35,135 --> 00:14:37,175 - Shut up, shut up! - Oh, my God! 373 00:14:37,175 --> 00:14:39,935 Slap her! She's hysterical. 374 00:14:39,935 --> 00:14:41,573 - Murder! Murder! - Slap her! 375 00:14:45,655 --> 00:14:48,055 Oh, spiffing! Absolutely spiffing. 376 00:14:48,055 --> 00:14:52,935 Well done. Two dead, 25 to go. 377 00:14:52,935 --> 00:14:54,050 Quick, Polly, Polly! 378 00:15:02,255 --> 00:15:03,615 I just dropped my ring. 379 00:15:03,615 --> 00:15:05,295 Oh, there it is. 380 00:15:05,295 --> 00:15:08,255 Oh, sorry, I'm in your way. 381 00:15:08,255 --> 00:15:10,007 That's quite all right. 382 00:15:12,295 --> 00:15:15,015 - Oh, is this your room? - Yes. 383 00:15:15,015 --> 00:15:16,095 It's lovely, isn't it? 384 00:15:16,095 --> 00:15:17,615 Yes. 385 00:15:17,615 --> 00:15:18,855 Did you enjoy your breakfast? 386 00:15:18,855 --> 00:15:20,935 Yes, thank you. Excuse us, 387 00:15:20,935 --> 00:15:22,255 do you think we could go inside and get our... 388 00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:24,255 Not really. 389 00:15:24,255 --> 00:15:25,495 Pardon? 390 00:15:25,495 --> 00:15:27,575 Well, it's being cleaned, Mr. Fawlty's doing it. 391 00:15:27,575 --> 00:15:28,895 But we want to get our things. 392 00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:30,015 We're going out, you see? 393 00:15:30,015 --> 00:15:31,615 Lt'll only take a couple of minutes. 394 00:15:31,615 --> 00:15:33,775 We're a little late, excuse me. 395 00:15:33,775 --> 00:15:36,415 Excuse me. Mr. Fawlty? 396 00:15:36,415 --> 00:15:37,895 - Mr. Fawlty? - All clear? 397 00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:40,775 - Mr. Fawlty? - Anybody about? 398 00:15:40,775 --> 00:15:43,895 Mr. And Mrs. White want to come into their room. 399 00:15:43,895 --> 00:15:45,487 Oh... 400 00:15:47,335 --> 00:15:49,132 Wait a minute! 401 00:15:50,135 --> 00:15:51,415 Hello. 402 00:15:51,415 --> 00:15:54,135 Can we come in? 403 00:15:54,135 --> 00:15:56,815 I was explaining that you were doing the room. 404 00:15:56,815 --> 00:15:57,850 Yes, won't be five minutes. 405 00:15:59,135 --> 00:16:01,215 Couldn't you do it later? 406 00:16:01,215 --> 00:16:03,895 Pick that ashtray up, will you, Manuel, please? 407 00:16:03,895 --> 00:16:06,095 The big one. Could we do it later? 408 00:16:06,095 --> 00:16:07,615 When we've got our things. 409 00:16:07,615 --> 00:16:08,975 It'll only be a couple of minutes. 410 00:16:08,975 --> 00:16:11,215 Look, Fawlty, we want our things! 411 00:16:11,215 --> 00:16:13,968 Right, yes, thank you so much. 412 00:16:15,855 --> 00:16:17,375 He's locked it. 413 00:16:17,375 --> 00:16:19,366 That's just a precaution. 414 00:16:20,375 --> 00:16:22,095 Have you locked this? 415 00:16:22,095 --> 00:16:24,086 Only slightly. 416 00:16:25,855 --> 00:16:28,244 - Will you let us in? - In a minute. 417 00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:31,934 Get the coats, get the coats. 418 00:16:34,215 --> 00:16:35,255 What's going on? 419 00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:37,564 He's a bit of a perfectionist. 420 00:16:39,615 --> 00:16:41,935 Ready! 421 00:16:41,935 --> 00:16:43,215 What's been going on in here? 422 00:16:43,215 --> 00:16:45,375 We tried rearranging the furniture, 423 00:16:45,375 --> 00:16:47,495 but it didn't really work. Manuel has your coats. 424 00:16:47,495 --> 00:16:48,895 Oh-hh... 425 00:16:48,895 --> 00:16:50,375 Oh-hh... 426 00:16:50,375 --> 00:16:51,933 Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh... 427 00:16:54,655 --> 00:16:55,855 It's all right, he's from Barcelona. 428 00:16:55,855 --> 00:16:57,335 Oh-hh! 429 00:16:57,335 --> 00:16:58,415 What's that noise? 430 00:16:58,415 --> 00:16:59,855 Oh, it's just my back. 431 00:16:59,855 --> 00:17:01,015 No, no, that moaning. 432 00:17:01,015 --> 00:17:02,295 Oh-hh... 433 00:17:02,295 --> 00:17:04,015 Oh, yes. That's odd. 434 00:17:04,015 --> 00:17:05,615 No, no, it's coming from the cupboard. 435 00:17:05,615 --> 00:17:06,895 Well, we'll get some oil. 436 00:17:06,895 --> 00:17:08,535 - Have a nice day. - There's someone in there. 437 00:17:08,535 --> 00:17:09,975 - What? - Yes, listen. 438 00:17:09,975 --> 00:17:10,975 No, no, no. 439 00:17:10,975 --> 00:17:13,295 Oh, please...! 440 00:17:13,295 --> 00:17:14,815 Good Lord, so there is. 441 00:17:14,815 --> 00:17:15,935 - Let them out! - Good idea. 442 00:17:15,935 --> 00:17:17,775 - Right, well, um... - Well, go on. 443 00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:19,255 We're going to. It's the next thing on the list. 444 00:17:19,255 --> 00:17:21,575 If you do get a chance to visit the museum... 445 00:17:21,575 --> 00:17:23,175 Open it now, will you? 446 00:17:23,175 --> 00:17:24,927 All right. Yes, right. 447 00:17:26,375 --> 00:17:29,095 Oh, it's locked. Oh, damn. 448 00:17:29,095 --> 00:17:30,655 - Where's the key? - Yes, where is the key? 449 00:17:30,655 --> 00:17:32,015 Do you have any idea, Polly, Manuel? 450 00:17:32,015 --> 00:17:33,575 I expect we've left it downstairs somewhere. 451 00:17:33,575 --> 00:17:34,615 Qué? 452 00:17:34,615 --> 00:17:36,095 - Where's the key? - Key's in your pocket. 453 00:17:36,095 --> 00:17:37,289 - No, it isn't. - Yes, it is. 454 00:17:41,455 --> 00:17:43,855 Well done, Manuel. Thank you very much. 455 00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:45,655 Right, well, we've got it now. 456 00:17:45,655 --> 00:17:47,935 - Give it to me... - All right, all right, I will. I will. 457 00:17:47,935 --> 00:17:50,654 Oh, Miss Tibbs! 458 00:17:57,655 --> 00:17:59,215 Now, I've warned you about this before. 459 00:17:59,215 --> 00:18:00,495 You can hide in your own cupboard 460 00:18:00,495 --> 00:18:01,935 but not in other people's! 461 00:18:01,935 --> 00:18:03,535 I'm sorry about this, you can't really blame her. 462 00:18:03,535 --> 00:18:05,775 She doesn't have much in her life. She has to make her own entertainment. 463 00:18:05,775 --> 00:18:07,375 She has trouble with her arm. 464 00:18:07,375 --> 00:18:09,375 That's why she goes in the cupboard. 465 00:18:09,375 --> 00:18:10,855 - Exactly. - Are you feeling better? 466 00:18:10,855 --> 00:18:13,015 Her arm gets stuck there. 467 00:18:13,015 --> 00:18:14,175 It's always happening to her. 468 00:18:14,175 --> 00:18:15,775 He's dead. 469 00:18:15,775 --> 00:18:16,935 It's her husband. She hasn't got over it. 470 00:18:16,935 --> 00:18:18,055 Died 30 years ago. 471 00:18:18,055 --> 00:18:20,855 She doesn't mean any arm. 472 00:18:20,855 --> 00:18:22,775 In the cupboard! 473 00:18:22,775 --> 00:18:24,575 No more today, you've had enough! 474 00:18:24,575 --> 00:18:25,849 Oh, my God, look at that! 475 00:18:39,295 --> 00:18:41,815 Thank you, Manuel. Manuel, thank you. 476 00:18:41,815 --> 00:18:43,855 That's enough. Thank you. 477 00:18:43,855 --> 00:18:45,891 Anything else we can do for you? 478 00:18:48,975 --> 00:18:50,735 It was so horrible, Mrs. Fawlty. 479 00:18:50,735 --> 00:18:53,575 - You've no idea. - Oh, I know. 480 00:18:53,575 --> 00:18:54,975 It was pitch black in there, 481 00:18:54,975 --> 00:18:57,895 and that thing... with its hand. 482 00:18:57,895 --> 00:18:59,851 Oh, I know. 483 00:19:01,095 --> 00:19:02,575 Now you have a little rest 484 00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:04,095 and try to think of something else. 485 00:19:04,095 --> 00:19:05,775 But anything could have happened. 486 00:19:05,775 --> 00:19:07,495 Well, he was dead, dear. 487 00:19:07,495 --> 00:19:09,455 A man is a man, Mrs. Fawlty. 488 00:19:09,455 --> 00:19:11,895 Oh, I know. 489 00:19:11,895 --> 00:19:13,095 I shall speak to him about it. 490 00:19:13,095 --> 00:19:14,215 Speak to him? 491 00:19:14,215 --> 00:19:15,375 To Mr. Fawlty. 492 00:19:15,375 --> 00:19:16,855 We're his oldest residents. 493 00:19:16,855 --> 00:19:18,575 Have a little rest first. 494 00:19:18,575 --> 00:19:19,975 Frightening me like that. 495 00:19:19,975 --> 00:19:21,855 I shall speak to him. 496 00:19:21,855 --> 00:19:23,695 Have a word with him in a little while 497 00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:26,295 when you're feeling better, hmm? 498 00:19:26,295 --> 00:19:28,135 I see, yes, thank you. 499 00:19:28,135 --> 00:19:30,855 It's all right, dear. They've got rooms at the Seaview. 500 00:19:30,855 --> 00:19:31,935 - Tonight? - Yes. 501 00:19:31,935 --> 00:19:33,175 Well, let's have a look at it. 502 00:19:33,175 --> 00:19:34,375 Yes, and if that's no good, 503 00:19:34,375 --> 00:19:36,809 we'll try the one up by the Prophylactic Emporium. 504 00:19:38,935 --> 00:19:39,970 Okay. 505 00:19:44,535 --> 00:19:46,207 Is... very heavy. 506 00:19:50,855 --> 00:19:52,055 Morning, Fawlty. 507 00:19:52,055 --> 00:19:53,055 Hello, Major. 508 00:19:53,055 --> 00:19:54,935 Any sign of the papers? 509 00:19:54,935 --> 00:19:56,935 You've got it, Major. 510 00:19:56,935 --> 00:19:59,535 Have I? Oh, yes, so I have. 511 00:19:59,535 --> 00:20:01,895 Oh, I say, Fawlty, he doesn't look... 512 00:20:01,895 --> 00:20:03,295 he doesn't look quite the ticket. 513 00:20:03,295 --> 00:20:04,775 Well, Major, 514 00:20:04,775 --> 00:20:07,855 don't say anything to anybody, but he's dead. 515 00:20:07,855 --> 00:20:10,005 Ah. Shot, was he? 516 00:20:11,855 --> 00:20:12,975 No, no, died in his sleep. 517 00:20:12,975 --> 00:20:13,975 In his sleep? 518 00:20:13,975 --> 00:20:16,015 Ah, well, you're off your guard, you see. 519 00:20:16,015 --> 00:20:17,415 Yes, yes. 520 00:20:17,415 --> 00:20:19,335 Oh, Fawlty... 521 00:20:19,335 --> 00:20:20,855 I shouldn't let him lie around here. 522 00:20:20,855 --> 00:20:22,415 No, the undertakers are coming to get him. 523 00:20:22,415 --> 00:20:25,134 Ah, 'cause they attract the flies, you see. 524 00:20:28,415 --> 00:20:29,895 Look, I've been waiting in there. 525 00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:32,015 - What? - I haven't had any breakfast yet. 526 00:20:32,015 --> 00:20:34,654 Oh, right, sorry. Coming, coming. 527 00:20:35,895 --> 00:20:37,487 It's only sausages. 528 00:20:40,935 --> 00:20:44,015 Mr. Fawlty! Mr. Fawlty! 529 00:20:44,015 --> 00:20:45,767 I want a word with you, please. 530 00:20:52,535 --> 00:20:53,975 Sorry about the delay, Doctor, 531 00:20:53,975 --> 00:20:56,443 normal service has been resumed as soon as possible. 532 00:20:58,015 --> 00:20:59,414 More coffee? 533 00:21:01,975 --> 00:21:02,975 Tea? Tea? 534 00:21:02,975 --> 00:21:04,567 I'll turn the radio down. 535 00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:13,015 Oh! 536 00:21:13,015 --> 00:21:14,535 - Miss Tibbs. - Oh, no. 537 00:21:14,535 --> 00:21:15,615 Would you believe it? 538 00:21:15,615 --> 00:21:17,055 What did you put him there for? 539 00:21:17,055 --> 00:21:19,175 He wouldn't fit in the safe and all the drawers were full. 540 00:21:19,175 --> 00:21:20,403 Come on, Manuel. 541 00:21:21,415 --> 00:21:22,735 Wonderful, isn't it, our guests? 542 00:21:22,735 --> 00:21:24,726 They give us trouble even when they're dead. 543 00:21:26,095 --> 00:21:28,529 - Where are you taking him? - Kitchen. 544 00:21:30,735 --> 00:21:32,885 - Polly! - Just a moment. 545 00:21:41,415 --> 00:21:42,564 Hello! 546 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,095 He's seriously ill. 547 00:21:57,095 --> 00:21:58,210 Oh, dear. 548 00:21:58,575 --> 00:22:00,335 Don't just stand there. Call a vet! 549 00:22:00,335 --> 00:22:01,655 Right. 550 00:22:01,655 --> 00:22:03,008 He's been poisoned. 551 00:22:05,055 --> 00:22:06,534 On the table. 552 00:22:14,535 --> 00:22:16,495 Sorry about that. Bit overdone, I'm afraid. 553 00:22:16,495 --> 00:22:17,928 We'll send 'em down the crematorium. 554 00:22:19,855 --> 00:22:21,655 You can't keep a dead body in here, 555 00:22:21,655 --> 00:22:22,895 where there's food. 556 00:22:22,895 --> 00:22:24,415 - Can't we? - Of course not. 557 00:22:24,415 --> 00:22:26,053 Oh, sorry. Manuel. 558 00:22:27,295 --> 00:22:28,967 Put him in there, in the basket. 559 00:22:30,135 --> 00:22:31,455 - Not in here. - What? 560 00:22:31,455 --> 00:22:32,695 Not in the kitchen. 561 00:22:32,695 --> 00:22:34,572 Oh, right. 562 00:22:45,935 --> 00:22:47,495 Oh, um, Sybil! 563 00:22:47,495 --> 00:22:49,495 I'm looking after Miss Tibbs, Basil. 564 00:22:49,495 --> 00:22:51,135 How are you feeling, dear? 565 00:22:51,135 --> 00:22:53,655 Won't be two minutes, okay? 566 00:22:53,655 --> 00:22:54,975 Sorry about that, Doctor. 567 00:22:54,975 --> 00:22:56,895 Wash your hands first, please. 568 00:22:56,895 --> 00:22:58,175 Oh, right. 569 00:22:58,175 --> 00:22:59,695 And make sure this area is scrubbed 570 00:22:59,695 --> 00:23:01,215 before any more food is prepared in here. 571 00:23:01,215 --> 00:23:02,535 Absolutely. 572 00:23:02,535 --> 00:23:03,655 Sausages excepted. You may cook them immediately. 573 00:23:03,655 --> 00:23:04,695 I'll take the risk. 574 00:23:04,695 --> 00:23:06,048 But of course. Toute suite. 575 00:23:09,855 --> 00:23:11,095 Leave it. 576 00:23:11,095 --> 00:23:12,935 - No, no, I take it. - Leave it. 577 00:23:12,935 --> 00:23:14,975 Is no time, please. No, no, no, please. 578 00:23:14,975 --> 00:23:15,975 I'm sitting here. 579 00:23:15,975 --> 00:23:17,215 Is no lunch till 12:00... 580 00:23:17,215 --> 00:23:18,375 I'm still having breakfast. 581 00:23:18,375 --> 00:23:22,095 Is finish, all gone, breakfast kaput. 582 00:23:22,095 --> 00:23:23,375 I'm having sausages. 583 00:23:23,375 --> 00:23:25,375 Is not allowed. 584 00:23:25,375 --> 00:23:27,815 Put that back. Look, I'm a doctor. 585 00:23:27,815 --> 00:23:29,215 I'm a doctor, and I want my sausages. 586 00:23:29,215 --> 00:23:31,495 I tell you, is finished. 587 00:23:31,495 --> 00:23:33,531 Bye, bye, please. Bye, bye. 588 00:23:38,215 --> 00:23:39,615 Now look... 589 00:23:39,615 --> 00:23:40,775 Is finish. 590 00:23:40,775 --> 00:23:43,295 Give those to me. Come on, come on. 591 00:23:43,295 --> 00:23:45,172 No, is no possible. 592 00:23:50,775 --> 00:23:52,855 - Is everything all right? - He want to eat now. 593 00:23:52,855 --> 00:23:55,375 I've been trying to sit down and he keeps moving things from my table. 594 00:23:55,375 --> 00:23:56,615 I'm so sorry. 595 00:23:56,615 --> 00:23:58,295 He doesn't understand that I haven't finished breakfast. 596 00:23:58,295 --> 00:23:59,444 Manuel... 597 00:24:01,615 --> 00:24:03,695 Manuel, let me explain. 598 00:24:03,695 --> 00:24:05,655 - Ow-ww! - All right? 599 00:24:05,655 --> 00:24:07,175 You understand? Good. 600 00:24:07,175 --> 00:24:09,086 They'll be ready in just a couple of minutes. 601 00:24:11,855 --> 00:24:14,535 There we are, Mr. Ingrams, number eight. 602 00:24:14,535 --> 00:24:16,055 Top of the stairs on the right. 603 00:24:16,055 --> 00:24:17,575 Excuse me not coming up with you, 604 00:24:17,575 --> 00:24:19,135 one of our guests has been taken ill. 605 00:24:19,135 --> 00:24:20,124 Thank you. 606 00:24:27,015 --> 00:24:29,055 - Excuse me? - In the office. 607 00:24:29,055 --> 00:24:31,095 - Excuse me? - Yes? 608 00:24:31,095 --> 00:24:32,847 We have an appointment with Mr. Leeman. 609 00:24:34,855 --> 00:24:36,215 Do you know where he is? 610 00:24:36,215 --> 00:24:38,815 Where he is? 611 00:24:38,815 --> 00:24:39,884 Let me think. 612 00:24:41,855 --> 00:24:43,527 Would he be in the dining room? 613 00:24:44,975 --> 00:24:46,375 Might he be in his room? 614 00:24:46,375 --> 00:24:49,208 Let me think. Where is he? 615 00:24:50,735 --> 00:24:52,615 We've come to collect him. 616 00:24:52,615 --> 00:24:54,895 - We're taking him... - I'm sorry? 617 00:24:54,895 --> 00:24:55,895 We've come to collect him. 618 00:24:55,895 --> 00:24:58,535 Oh, you've come to collect him! 619 00:24:58,535 --> 00:24:59,615 Yes. 620 00:24:59,615 --> 00:25:01,975 I'm sorry, I didn't realize. 621 00:25:01,975 --> 00:25:04,215 - Modern dress. - What? 622 00:25:04,215 --> 00:25:05,807 Your dress is very modern. 623 00:25:07,935 --> 00:25:09,335 I didn't realize women did it. 624 00:25:09,335 --> 00:25:10,814 - Did what? - Shh-hh. 625 00:25:12,775 --> 00:25:13,775 He's downstairs? 626 00:25:13,775 --> 00:25:15,367 No, no, in the basket. 627 00:25:17,135 --> 00:25:18,375 I beg your pardon? 628 00:25:18,375 --> 00:25:19,775 He's in the basket. 629 00:25:19,775 --> 00:25:23,215 - In the basket? - Yes. Hello. 630 00:25:23,215 --> 00:25:26,048 What's he doing in the basket? 631 00:25:28,655 --> 00:25:30,452 Well, not much. 632 00:25:32,215 --> 00:25:33,855 What are you talking about? 633 00:25:33,855 --> 00:25:35,447 Don't you believe...? Look, look. 634 00:25:45,415 --> 00:25:47,215 Oh, my God, he's gone. Where is he? 635 00:25:47,215 --> 00:25:50,571 - Fresh laundry. - They've taken him! 636 00:25:53,015 --> 00:25:55,370 Stop! Stop! 637 00:26:03,935 --> 00:26:05,895 Basil! 638 00:26:05,895 --> 00:26:06,175 If you could just hang on a couple of minutes. 639 00:26:06,175 --> 00:26:08,695 If you could just hang on a couple of minutes. 640 00:26:08,695 --> 00:26:09,684 Sorry to keep you. 641 00:26:11,855 --> 00:26:13,855 It's all right. It's all right. 642 00:26:13,855 --> 00:26:16,608 We've sorted it out. He's in this one. 643 00:26:18,855 --> 00:26:20,815 The doctor didn't want him in the kitchen, 644 00:26:20,815 --> 00:26:23,175 - so we put him in the basket. - It's more hygienic. 645 00:26:23,175 --> 00:26:25,006 Basil! 646 00:26:27,455 --> 00:26:29,295 - Yes? - You do work here? 647 00:26:29,295 --> 00:26:30,455 Yes. 648 00:26:30,455 --> 00:26:32,015 We'd like to speak to the manager. 649 00:26:32,015 --> 00:26:33,812 I'm the manager. Is there a problem? 650 00:26:35,855 --> 00:26:38,015 He is, really. 651 00:26:38,015 --> 00:26:40,815 There seems to be some misunderstanding. 652 00:26:40,815 --> 00:26:43,095 We've come to collect one of your guests, 653 00:26:43,095 --> 00:26:44,615 a Mr. Leeman, 654 00:26:44,615 --> 00:26:45,975 to take him into town for a meeting. 655 00:26:45,975 --> 00:26:47,895 - Meeting? - Yes, a meeting. 656 00:26:47,895 --> 00:26:49,772 With our managing director. 657 00:26:53,015 --> 00:26:54,975 Oh, I see. Mr. Leeman. 658 00:26:54,975 --> 00:26:56,735 Yes. 659 00:26:56,735 --> 00:26:59,175 We thought you said... the linen. 660 00:26:59,175 --> 00:27:00,608 Brilliant! Sorry, sorry, that's it. 661 00:27:01,855 --> 00:27:04,295 - Sorry to keep you. - Hello, my sweet. 662 00:27:04,295 --> 00:27:06,535 - What are you doing, Basil? - It's a bit involved, dear, 663 00:27:06,535 --> 00:27:08,255 but we thought that these gentlemen thought 664 00:27:08,255 --> 00:27:10,215 - that we thought... - No, no, no... 665 00:27:10,215 --> 00:27:12,815 No, they were coming for Mr. Leeman, 666 00:27:12,815 --> 00:27:15,175 and we thought they were coming to collect the linen. 667 00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:16,335 Mr. Leeman? 668 00:27:16,335 --> 00:27:18,615 So, if you just sort that one out, dear, 669 00:27:18,615 --> 00:27:20,375 I'll take the linen upstairs. 670 00:27:20,375 --> 00:27:21,975 I see. Thank you, Basil. 671 00:27:21,975 --> 00:27:23,328 Not at all. 672 00:27:27,695 --> 00:27:30,289 Would you mind coming into the office for a moment? 673 00:27:36,935 --> 00:27:37,975 Another one, Fawlty? 674 00:27:37,975 --> 00:27:39,895 No, same one, Major. 675 00:27:39,895 --> 00:27:40,930 Ah. 676 00:27:45,255 --> 00:27:47,007 Oh, sorry, sorry. 677 00:27:48,975 --> 00:27:51,011 - They've gone into the town. - In there. 678 00:27:56,535 --> 00:27:57,524 Oh! 679 00:28:01,375 --> 00:28:03,735 Sorry, wrong room. 680 00:28:03,735 --> 00:28:06,249 Estoy muy... cansado. 681 00:28:13,015 --> 00:28:14,815 - Back in the basket. - I can't lift. 682 00:28:14,815 --> 00:28:16,735 - Come on, come on. - No, too tired. 683 00:28:16,735 --> 00:28:17,975 There's somebody coming. 684 00:28:17,975 --> 00:28:20,655 Mr. Fawlty, I no want to work here anymore. 685 00:28:20,655 --> 00:28:22,135 - Open the basket. - No. 686 00:28:22,135 --> 00:28:23,363 Open the basket! 687 00:28:26,415 --> 00:28:27,814 Now, inside. 688 00:28:29,135 --> 00:28:30,535 Not you. 689 00:28:30,535 --> 00:28:31,575 - I quit. - Get out! 690 00:28:31,575 --> 00:28:33,295 - I on strike. - I'm warning you. 691 00:28:33,295 --> 00:28:34,489 I stay here, is nice. 692 00:28:36,055 --> 00:28:39,255 You see this? You're next! 693 00:28:39,255 --> 00:28:41,415 Really, I'm so sorry. 694 00:28:41,415 --> 00:28:42,855 - Thank you. - Thank you. 695 00:28:42,855 --> 00:28:44,535 - Goodbye. - Goodbye. 696 00:28:44,535 --> 00:28:47,055 - Goodbye. - Goodbye. 697 00:28:47,055 --> 00:28:48,204 Goodbye. 698 00:28:50,095 --> 00:28:52,609 - Yes? - Could I get my hat? 699 00:28:54,175 --> 00:28:55,735 Your hat? 700 00:28:55,735 --> 00:28:57,055 Yes, it's just there. 701 00:28:57,055 --> 00:28:58,175 Yes, I'll have it sent on. 702 00:28:58,175 --> 00:29:01,735 Do you have a card with your address? I'll send it on. 703 00:29:01,735 --> 00:29:03,535 Well, could I just get it? 704 00:29:03,535 --> 00:29:05,924 Do you have to have it now? 705 00:29:07,415 --> 00:29:08,575 Well, yes. 706 00:29:08,575 --> 00:29:10,655 Supposing you lose it? It is windy today. 707 00:29:10,655 --> 00:29:12,168 I'd like to have it. 708 00:29:13,535 --> 00:29:15,335 Oh, right. 709 00:29:15,335 --> 00:29:19,055 - Manuel! Manuel! - He's in the basket. 710 00:29:19,055 --> 00:29:20,895 Polly, would you get Manuel 711 00:29:20,895 --> 00:29:21,895 out of the basket, please? 712 00:29:21,895 --> 00:29:23,015 Manuel? 713 00:29:23,015 --> 00:29:24,295 Yes, come on, girl. What's the matter? 714 00:29:24,295 --> 00:29:26,655 - He isn't in there. - Yes, he is. 715 00:29:26,655 --> 00:29:29,655 - He isn't. - He is. Look for him. 716 00:29:29,655 --> 00:29:30,655 Oh, sorry. 717 00:29:30,655 --> 00:29:32,935 You big scab. 718 00:29:32,935 --> 00:29:34,288 See? 719 00:29:36,295 --> 00:29:37,855 Manuel, will you get this gentlemen his hat, please? 720 00:29:37,855 --> 00:29:39,415 - Where? - There. 721 00:29:39,415 --> 00:29:41,295 On the rack. 722 00:29:41,295 --> 00:29:42,775 - Sorry. What color was it? - Brown. 723 00:29:42,775 --> 00:29:44,415 - Brown. - No, that's not it. 724 00:29:44,415 --> 00:29:46,175 Thank you. 725 00:29:46,175 --> 00:29:47,455 Mr. Fawlty, 726 00:29:47,455 --> 00:29:49,015 I want a word with you in your office. 727 00:29:49,015 --> 00:29:50,455 When would be convenient for you? 728 00:29:50,455 --> 00:29:52,575 I'm 79. 729 00:29:52,575 --> 00:29:54,175 What on earth is going on here? 730 00:29:54,175 --> 00:29:55,895 Sorry about the eiderdown. It got a bit caught. 731 00:29:55,895 --> 00:29:59,615 My baby, my baby's dying. They've poisoned him! 732 00:29:59,615 --> 00:30:00,655 Your baby? 733 00:30:00,655 --> 00:30:02,615 - Sybil! - He said he'd call for a vet. 734 00:30:02,615 --> 00:30:04,055 - A vet? - Sybil! 735 00:30:04,055 --> 00:30:07,015 I've just cooked these sausages myself and they're off. 736 00:30:07,015 --> 00:30:08,655 They should have been eaten by the third. 737 00:30:08,655 --> 00:30:10,775 There you are, dear. You do look nice. 738 00:30:10,775 --> 00:30:13,695 Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen. 739 00:30:13,695 --> 00:30:15,655 Laundry's ready! Ladies and gentlemen, 740 00:30:15,655 --> 00:30:17,615 there have been a lot of cock-ups this morning. 741 00:30:17,615 --> 00:30:20,135 You all deserve an explanation, and I'm happy to say, 742 00:30:20,135 --> 00:30:22,330 that my wife will give it to you. Thank you so much. 743 00:30:33,855 --> 00:30:35,811 What's going on, old boy? 744 00:30:37,095 --> 00:30:38,575 Basil! 745 00:30:38,575 --> 00:30:40,855 Basil! Basil! 746 00:30:40,855 --> 00:30:43,005 Basil! Basil!